To the Men I Love

Dear Beloved,

 

Thank you for opening up to me

For witnessing me in all that I am

For your courage to open your

heart and soul for me.

 

Our love may come in different shapes

as friends or lovers – or something in between

and it may change every day.

 

You’re not my partner

As I am my own main ally

I need to learn to hold myself

When I’m celebrating and when I’m afraid.

 

Yes, I am desiring a King

Someone to stand next to me

and to sit on the throne that stands next to mine.

 

I dust it off every now and then,

but I don’t rush to fill it

as it takes slaying dragons and

fighting battles to claim it.

 

It doesn’t take saving princesses though –

this Queen has got her own back

and she’s not looking for a white knight.

Loving me isn’t easy

as I will give you no guarantees

no false promises and no seatbelts.

 

We will dive deep and fast.

I will show you all of me –

It is a lot

It has freaked out many men before.

 

I will confront you with what you

don’t like about yourself

and likely the current of our connection

will take us both into wild waters of intensity

of all sorts.

 

I am holding myself as I am

asking you to hold yourself.

In the eye of the storm or in still waters

In passion and insecurities.

 

This heart of mine, it’s big

and it loves so many.

It has scars of loves who came before,

that made it even bigger.

 

My journey isn’t done

Opening myself to get to know

my depths even more

through the mirror of many.

 

I’m a wild woman, you see?

A panther in disguise.

Not to be captured or tamed

But to walk along with,

gracefully.

 

Trusting my choices

Knowing respect, honesty, and integrity

are my highest values

I’ll treat you as I desire to be treated

myself.

 

I ask you to trust me

Love me fiercely

Lust me tenderly

And shape-shift as we move

 

Choosing to open up to each other

Every moment anew.

 

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