The Deeper We Love, the Deeper Love Will Touch Us

The deeper we love, the deeper love will touch us. It is as incredible as it sounds, though not always easy. As love tears down everything in its way to loving more, all our deepest stories, pain, fear and insecurity is revealed in the wake of unleashing bliss. And not just our own! All that which our ancestors carry, what’s engraved in our collective past and present, It’s all right here, right now. So beware, when you open your heart wider than before, That more love than you can imagine will pour in, And your senses sensitize As there’s no right or wrong, desired or undesired on our inner landscape, just simple aliveness, It all becomes stronger. More. Deeper. Become…

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(Video) Conscious Relationship Design: What To Do When My Partner Is Avoidant / Afraid of Commitment?

today I choose to live

In any human dynamic, certain patterns will come up. And those patterns will influence how you feel and how you act. It’s a thing: people with a fear of abandonment attract people with a fear of commitment. This is the anxious/avoidant dynamic we sometimes speak about. Is it possible to avoid this trap, or heal it when we’re in it?

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(Video) Conscious Relationship Design: Where do I Base My Boundaries On?

David & Wilrieke

In any human dynamic, certain patterns will come up. And those patterns will influence how you feel and how you act. Where do you base your boundaries and desires upon? And what to do when yours are different than those of your partner?

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Why I like Kink and BDSM

Why I like Kink

When I tell people I’m a fan of kink or BDSM, there are usually three possible responses. Many people have no idea what I’m talking about. Others wonder why someone on the path of personal growth would be interested in something abusive and violent as BDSM. And then there are some who understand and are happy to find someone who agrees. Thanks to Fifty Shades of Grey and the many erotic novels that followed in its wake, BDSM – or the SM part of it, has become more mainstream as a flavor in the bedroom. But the picture these stories sketch a very limited, and in my opinion unhealthy, picture of this erotic art form. So what is it that…

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Don’t Live In a Box

Those days where I feel unhappy, stuck and trapped, I notice I’ve been putting myself in a box again. It’s a thing. A paradoxical thing. Humans like to put their world into boxes. Other humans, their calendar, their work, their relationship, their sexuality, other connections to other humans… I noticed that when I boxed myself heterosexual I felt weird about feeling attracted to women. Feeling stuck in a worldview where it didn’t make sense to like other than men. But when I discovered that queers make my knees shake, bisexuality felt like a limiting option too. I had exchanged one box for another, and again I felt stuck, trapped and didn’t understand myself. So I stepped out of the sexuality…

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(Video) Is Tantra Still Safe?

After #metoo and #mentoo and #metoointantra, and now Tantra workshops become more abundant than mushrooms in an autumn forest, what to do and where to go? (Little blurb of WiFi challenges halfway, skip to 3 minutes when it starts to bypass..)

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Slowing Down

Slowing down

I always tell it to my students and clients: to slow down. Because slowing down means giving time and space to underlying feelings and processes. Emotions and sensations that we usually skip because we’re in our heads, in a hurry, or just somewhere at the desired or undesired end goal. We’re in the future or past, but not present with our precious self – right now. And then when we slow down, we start to feel stuff. Uncomfortable probably. Are we here, yet again? It’s such a temptation to go faster again. To move through this discomfort with a swift pace. We might reach comfy grounds again, but did we shift anything? Learned anything? Let go of anything? Then I…

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What I learned in the year after breaking up my long-term relationship

What I learned in the year after breaking up my long-term relationship

Once we thought we would stay together for life. And in a way, we will, since we have three daughters. But not in a romantic relationship. About twelve months ago we broke up. It felt like facing my deepest fears. It felt like dying. And maybe I did in a way, as the last year transformed me completely. No more happily ever after We were so convinced we were going to make it through life together. Even though I got pregnant only months after we met, we hardly had any money, and I didn’t finish studying. I never had a long-term relationship before. I never was pregnant before. It all felt so new. He was my rock to depend on.…

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The emotional and spiritual benefits of deepthroating

Deepthroating

She looked up at the man standing in front of her. His eyes were filled with predator-like desire. She allowed her eyes to linger over his bare chest, following the trail of dark hairs from his belly button into his jeans. With a strong hand under her chin he lifted her head, locked her eyes with his gaze. Without losing eye-contact, he slowly unbuttoned his fly with his other hand. She could feel the heat coming from his groins, as she sat on her knees only centimeters away from his cock. He lowered his pants slowly until his cock sprung out, touching her lips. “Open your mouth”, he said. She licked her lips, lubricating her mouth as she was well…

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How are you editing your life?

How do you edit your life?

As a writer they tell you to edit your writing by deleting at least thirty percent of the words you have written. Do you realize most of us do the same thing with our lives? We edit parts of our lives by hiding them, erasing them and forgetting about them all together. Sometimes it’s quite useful to let go of certain things. Think about biting nails or drawing pictures of colorful houses with crayons on the wallpaper of our parents’ living room. But we also edit precious parts of our lives. We erase things we love. Why? The castle metaphor My friend Jamie Catto often uses the metaphor of a castle in his workshops. He says that we are all…

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