We want you to know that all your feedback is welcome. Whether you applaud us for certain things (we love to hear that!), whether we can improve, or whether we absolutely messed up.
You may want to (re-)read our Ethics Statement, Terms and Conditions, or Covid Statement to check what we promised.
Contact Wilrieke directly
When it feels safe to reach out to us directly, we invite you send Wilrieke a message through the contact form. These messages end up directly in Wilrieke’s inbox. Nobody else will read the message, and both your identity and the content will be treated confidentially unless otherwise agreed. Wilrieke will inform you about what she will do with your feedback.
Contact the Accountability Pod
You may feel that for whatever reason, it doesn’t feel safe to approach Wilrieke personally with your feedback or complaint. In this case, you are welcomed to contact one of the members of Wilrieke’s Accountability Pod.
About the Accountability Pod
We, Legien Warsosemito-Schenk, Roos Reijbroek, Tanya Rozenthal and Wilrieke Sophia are professionals in the field of sexuality, intimacy and relationships. Our activities differ from each other; from consultancy to bodywork, from retreats to session work, from therapy to pleasure experiences. Our personal backgrounds are also different; we differ in terms of gender, sexual preference, ethnicity, neurodiversity, education, nationality, work experience and age. We value what we each do, and have no business interests in each other’s companies.
What we have in common is that it is not easy for each of us to join a regular professional group in the Netherlands. This is, for example, because our work is “self-created” and not regulated, because our profession in the Netherlands is too small, because our activities are too diverse, because we work in niche communities and therefore cannot meet certain conditions, or because we feel uncomfortable in an institutionalized large-scale group.
We work with clients and communities in vulnerable settings. That is precisely why we find it extra important to reflect on our work ethics and to be accountable for our actions. We are human like anyone else and despite our best intentions we sometimes misjudge, make a mistake and cause suffering. When it comes to sexuality, intimacy and relationships, integrity extends beyond the legal. We have therefore autonomously designed the advantages of a professional group, namely reflection and complaint handling, in a way that suits us: an accountability pod.
The idea of accountability comes from transformational justice, in which change is central (instead of punishment or exclusion). An accountability pod is a group of people that gathers together when something has gone wrong. Because general apologies or arguments about who’s to blame often do not solve anything, an accountability pod focuses on the interests of the person who has experienced an incident, what that person needs to be able to continue in a balanced way, and thus not on punishing the person who has caused that incident. However, the person who caused suffering is held responsible for their actions by the pod. The emphasis here is not on penance, but on clarifying behavioural patterns, changing them and being publicly transparent about this if this can serve the reporter and the community. You can read exactly how it all works [here].
In addition, we keep each other on our toes in a monthly intervision meeting that is completely devoted to work ethics: what is good and right? What responsibilities do we have in complex situations? Where can we expand our awareness of positions of power and other privileges? Although we are committed to each other, the importance of integrity and care is the starting point, even if it is difficult and confrontational.
Contacting the Accountability Pod
For anyone who interacts with us in our professional role, this means the following: have you had an experience with us in which we have caused you harm, or in which you feel we have failed? And is it not possible for you, for whatever reason, to talk about this directly with that person? Then you can approach the accountability pod. You choose the person of your preference and contact them below. Any report is taken very seriously and the interests of the reporter are paramount. The accountability pod takes care of the emotional needs of you as a reporter and of the structuring of your report. We think along about whether and how you want to involve the person who caused the suffering and if you want to talk to them, we provide mediation.
While we hope to get few messages, we are very happy if you reach out to us. It is precisely on this personal level that we make the difference between painful silence and equal transparency.
> More about how we work
She/her & They/them
- Intersections I recognise myself in, are (low identifying) woman, bi/pan/queerness, intersectional feminist, neurodivergent, survivor of abuse, highly educated, white, middle class, stigmatized work background, sex positive.
- I work as a relationship coach specialized in nonmonogamy, public speaker, facilitator, trainer.
- Within the field of self-cultivation, alternative care and sexual exploration I have seen (in the role of participant and assistant) how misconduct and the consequential harm have been swept under the carpet. As an organizer, I’ve learned by trial and error that good intentions are not enough to make a session or workshop a “safe” space. Since I want the best for everyone who puts their faith in me, I wish to be accountable for my behavior, especially when something went wrong. In the same spirit, I wish to keep others in positions of power and care accountable for their doings. When we pay empathic attention to harm and grief, positive change happens instantly.
- People describe me as sincere, critical, crystal clear, punctual, disarming, idealistic, realistic.
pansexual, ecosexual, sapiosexual, citizen of the world, survivor, pioneer, inspirator, healer artist, mystica, seer, medicine woman, trickster, mother, crone, nomad, peace seeker, wisdom keeper..
Guidance, training, therapy and coaching in the field of love, eroticism, intimacy and relationships. Sexual healing, sexual shamanism, sacred sexuality and Tantra. Embodiment alchemist, facilitator in-depth work for the groups and in tribal settings, transformative retreats & intensives, shadow work & transpersonal guidance, psychotrauma, plant medicine, ritualist-systemic healer. Ecosexuality, ecology of love and relationships.
- For me it can’t be enough about truth and maturity, being present in reality. Accountability is appropriating everything that belongs to me. And to learn to navigate that, in integrity of connection with the other. I know what it feels like to be treated unfairly, to have to deal with rejection and bullying.
Ethics is the power to stay in the middle and shine light from the core on everything that stands in the way of living our potential, seeing what damages us, separates us and makes us smaller. Dealing with power, learning about hidden dynamics of cultural legacies, taboos and blind spots. Exposing shadow processes. My life’s work is about restoring the original ecology of love and relationships. Because I work with traumas, I know better than anyone the importance of the clean ground on which I stand. What do I carry out, and how do I walk my talk?
- I am adventurous, empathetic, chaotic, introverted, artistic, eccentric, creative, intuitive and intellectual. My strength lies in my vulnerability and inspired wisdom.
- Female, Javanese-Surinamese, subtle autistic, mother, spouse of my wonderful husband, dancer of life, projector (Human Design), analyzer (character structures), daughter of hard-working parents
- #MeToo coaching, training and consultancy
- Coach, confidential counselor, trainer, speaker, activist
- Themes: sexuality – both trauma and pleasure
- Consent is crucial to me in life. In consent we can honor, respect and appreciate each other. With consent, the most beautiful things in life can happen. I stand for a world in which we can learn, where we grow together. That includes being able to address each other if norms and values are not respected.
- I expect the people around me, such as clients and participants, to be open for feedback. By setting the example myself, I hope to contribute to a culture in which this becomes a normality.
- The analyzer in me likes to work carefully and with passion on subjects that are close to my heart.
- I love it when we treat each other fairly and we are being treated fairly.
- People call me involved, loving, accessible and see that I express my masculine and feminine qualities with gentle strength.