Frequently Asked Questions

Extra info on play parties is mentioned here. Extra info on social behavior during events here.

What does the colour code of this event mean?

We use a system of colours to explain what happens in an event with regard to sexuality:

White: clothes stay on, and there is no sexuality or nudity. (e.g. cuddle workshops.)
Pink: partial nudity is allowed but genitals stay covered. Sensual play is possible. (e.g. energy sex workshops and pink play parties.)
Red: full nudity and sexual interactions are possible (e.g. exploring kink, red play parties.)

What workshop should I go to (next)?

This is a web that shows most of the workshops hosted by Wilrieke in a web, with some suggestions on how to navigate through the offerings. Please understand this is by no means a hierarchical model: white workshops are not ‘less’ than red ones. This is just a simplification to show which workshops fall in which colour code.

How many people are coming?

This differs per event, and we can’t completely predict it. Usually, it’s between 20 and 55 people.

What is the man/woman ratio?

We try to avoid overrepresentation of any gender, therefore we balance ticket sales. We actively welcome all genders, sexual preferences, etc. We do not tolerate misogyny, queerphobia, transfobia, etc.

Can I come alone?

Absolutely! Most people do in fact.

I’m new. Will I feel at home?

We hope you do! We will do all we can to make you feel at home. many people share after their first (or many-ist) play party that they finally found a place where they can be themselves.

Can I come with my partner(s)?

Absolutely! If you wish to only play with them, that’s absolutely fine. We always try to explain exercises before we do them, so you can check in with your partner whether you want to do this together or apart.

Can I play with multiple people?

Absolutely.

Are drugs/alcohol welcome in the space?

Nope. We hold a zero-tolerance policy. Mind-altering substances do just that. We want your head to be clear about your boundaries and desires.

Is this space queer-friendly?

We sure hope so! Most of us (i.e. the team) identify as queer ourselves. Wilrieke is queer AF. We know what it’s like to not feel welcome or unsafe, and we do what we can to make you feel as welcome and safe as possible. We can already tell you that we usually have a fair percentage of queer folks joining us, including trans folks, non-binary, etc. We love people with binders, strapons, packers, crossdressing and anything that makes you feel affirmed with the gender you identify with.

Practicalities during the event

What do I wear?

Wear what makes you feel comfortable during the workshops. Bring some layers, as you might get hot or cold. For play parties, you can play with what you want to embody or experience: maybe a hidden part that desires some unveiling? Is there a part you’d like to celebrate? Something that makes you feel safe to be in an exciting environment? Your pyjamas? Or do as I do and bring different options, so you can choose at the moment.

What do I eat?

To keep tickets at affordable pricing, we ask you to bring some (vegetarian) food to share for events that include lunch and/or dinner. If you bring a bit more than just for yourself, we will end up with a luscious, abundant potluck. Made or bought with love is equally fine! We will provide tea, water and some snacks throughout the event.

Where do I sleep?

Unless specifically mentioned, events do NOT include lodging. All our event spaces are near hotels. In utrecht you can find hotels around the Central Statiuon, which is walking distance from the venue. Amsterdam Weesperzijde is close to the Volkshotel. Amsterdam Baarsjesweg is near Hotel Not Hotel, Conscious Hotel Vondelpark, and Hotel Heye 130.

Do I bring toys or ropes?

You can bring ropes or other toys that may increase your pleasure for the play parties. We will provide a wide range of things for shared use and to try out, partly sponsored by the amazing Tailboneshop.com.

Do I bring safer sex materials?

We bring different kinds of safer sex materials, depending on the nature of the event. We always bring hand sanitizer. For pink events we bring gloves, toys linked to the topic. For red play parties we bring condoms, dental dams, lubes, gloves, etc. If you need something specific (material or size), please bring it!

What if I don’t feel like touching someone?

Then you don’t. We will never push you to do anything, nor to do anything with anyone. You can come, decide to keep all your clothes on and not touch anyone – and that’s perfect. You can also always sit out an exercise – we encourage you to do so.

I’m a man and I only want to touch women. Can I?

You decide who you touch. We won’t mediate based on gender though. (This means: you are responsible for who you choose to touch.)

About tickets, cancellations & resales

How much is it?

You find that info in the ticket shop. There is a limited amount of budget tickets, meant for people with limited financial resources. We trust you to choose the ticket that fits your situation. As our current venue does not provide mattresses and we ask you to bring soft things, we have decided to not raise our prices by 6% this year (the expected inflation rate) to compensate you for your trouble.

Why gendered tickets?

We want to include everyone, whatever your gender or identification is. That means there’s space for everyone, without one group getting over-represented. Therefore there are tickets for people who identify themselves as male, female and other.

(We realize that there are many gender identities outside the binary norms. For practical reasons, we have summarized them as a category ‘other’ on the ticket sales pages. We apologize to anyone who does not feel represented by this category.)

Please only buy a ticket that represents your gender – and not any other ticket. Sold out = sold out.

What if I can’t come anymore?

There are administration costs involved, but refunds are possible until 14 days before the play party. You are free to sell your ticket to someone else (see Wilrieke’s terms and conditions for elaborate information about our refund options). Please respect the gender of the ticket (if you buy an ungendered ticket, e.g. a budget ticket, please sell your ticket to someone with a similar gender to yours). In case we send pre-/aftercare emails, forward them to the person you sold your ticket to. We don’t mediate in selling tickets.

What if tickets are sold out?

You can ask for a ticket in the FB-event or in the Exploring Deeper Online Community. Usually, there are multiple play parties planned ahead. There is no waitinglist.

I’m a man and tickets for men are sold out. Can I buy an ‘other’ ticket?

No. And if you do, we won’t let you in. This has been tried too often despite our information everywhere. It’s not cool, it’s not okay, and we won’t give you a refund. When tickets are sold out, buy a ticket for another event, or try to buy a ticket from someone selling his.

Frequently Asked Questions