Exploring Kink Step 1: The Intensive (Former Kinky Tantra)

Exploring Kink (formerly known as Kinky Tantra) is a way to add spice, depth and presence to all your relationships. In this workshop, we combine principles of consent and (neo-)Tantra with the magical realms of BDSM.

This workshop includes opportunities to:

• learn how to set up a scene
• practice impeccable consent – and how it brings safety for any kind of play
• learn cool skills like spanking, flogging and caning
• learn some surprising sexy hacks that change and intensify your play
• improve communication skills for your current and future relationships
• experience your Inner Navigation System and how it tells you what to do
• get to know amazing like-minded people in the best way!

※

This is Exploring Kink, Step 1: The Intensive, a weekend of exploring Kink in an intuitive, tantric way. You will learn how the practices of kink, consent, and (neo)tantra are no opposites, but complementary pathways that can increase each other’s depth and effect.

You can come alone (many people do), with your partner/s or friend/s. Couples may choose to stay together if that feels the most important for them. This event welcomes all levels of play. Some experience with workshops in intimacy (tantra, kink, cuddling, massage) is recommended. 

Note: this is a red event, which means that during some parts of the event full nudity and sexual play are possible (this will mainly be during the play party). At no point during this weekend you are required or pushed to be naked or sexual. You can participate in the full weekend while being dressed and without touching anyone. We do ask you to be comfortable with nudity and sexuality in the room. 

We use a system of colours to explain what happens in an event with regards to sexuality:

• White: clothes stay on, there is no sexuality or nudity. (e.g. cuddle workshops.)
• Pink: partial nudity is allowed but genitals stay covered. Sensual play is possible. (e.g. energy sex workshops and pink play parties.)
• Red: full nudity and sexual interactions are possible (e.g. exploring kink, red play parties.)

This event welcomes folks from all walks of life. We are LGBTQIIA+ informed (Wilrieke and most of her team identify as such), slut-friendly, trauma-informed, and non-monogamy informed. White folks are overrepresented in our team and life experiences are coloured through that lens. We do come from different social backgrounds and have different life experiences when it comes to health, wealth, neurodiversity, gender, sexual orientation, etc. 

We welcome disabled folks and have good experiences with you participating in our events and sessions. Some of our venues include stairs or other challenges, but usually, we have a very helpful team of assistants who lovingly support, e.g. by carrying you, your wheelchair up and down stairs, hold doors for you, or assist in other ways. If you have a person that supports you in daily activities that you need to bring for your care, they can of course come with you without buying a ticket. Please reach out if you have special needs, and we will discuss how we can support you. In case we cannot comfort your needs, we will honestly let you know. 

※

What the weekend looks like:

This weekend is designed as a full-on deep-dive into the world of kink. The first day is an intensive day. After a welcome and introductions, we start playing with tuning into your body as an Inner Navigation System. Always get to know where the breaks are before we speed up! We will play with the polarities of Domination and surrender, leading and following. In the second part of the day you will get to know different ways of playing with impact. You will get to know your hands as amazing tools for impact play, and you have the opportunity to try different impact play tools like floggers, canes and paddles.

On the second day we will take time sharing about our experiences and learning from each other. Then we will bring in some new elements into your play, working with different senses. The second part of this day is designed as a Play Party where you can practice with amazing people, supported by Wilrieke and her amazing team. If you want to practice specific things, ask questions (we love to geek out!), have us look over your shoulder, or dance and integrate – there’s space for it all!

Timings:

Saturday: 10.00h – 18.00h (doors open at 9.30h)

Sunday: 11.00h – 19.00h with soft ending until 20.00h (doors open at 9.30)

Buy tickets here! >>>

※

This event is for you if:

• you are curious about kink and BDSM, and look for a great way to start your journey
• you know the basics of kink and BDSM, but you want to deepen your skills
• you like (neo-)tantra, and you are looking for something more
• you want to broaden your display of sexy skills
• you want to feel more secure about yourself and learn how to step up for yourself (hint: kink is my favourite tool for this!)

This event is NOT for you if:

• you are not willing to accept another person’s ‘no’
• we actively stand for inclusion. This means that in the event no racism, discrimination, misogyny, ableism, or shaming of bodies, sexualities, gender etc are tolerated. If this is something you cannot commit to, this is not your community.
• we accept all political viewpoints and personal opinions, but we also actively stand against the spread of misinformation and disinformation. If you are looking for places to share your viewpoints on vaccine shedding, this is not your community.
• we MAY ask for a covid quick test, vaccine, or other way to minimise the risk of spreading covid at this event. If this is principally against your values, you may want to reconsider signing up. 
• you are looking for easy sex. You won’t find it here.

※

Why conscious kink and principles of (neo-)tantra?

Conscious kink is the path of explicit polarity. In daily love making the roles of giving vs. taking (or leading vs. following, guiding vs. surrendering) can be blurry, ending in that nobody really can focus on what is happening. Kink can support us bringing back that juicy polarity.

Tantra, because it’s the path that embraces *everything* that is present *now* without judgment. It’s an ever-ongoing unfolding of the deepest surrender possible to life itself.

‘Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional.’ Tantra inspires me to open up deeper to myself (i.e. life), zoom out of the suffering, and return to a state of flow, happiness and bliss easier every day (except, well, some days).

Consciously designed kinky scenes are also amazing for trauma healing, embracing inner power, as well as connecting to parts of us that scare us (both as the dominant or submissive) but keep us away from fully embracing ourselves and our power as long as we don’t fully do so.

(If you want to read more about my fascination with tantra & Conscious Kink, check this article out)

※

What is a play party?

A play party is a co-created space of endless exploration based on your own desires and boundaries. Within that playground, there are endless possibilities!

Co-creation means that we start together in a circle. There are agreements (like confidentiality, respecting relationship agreements, taking care of your own wellbeing, and a few more) that we share and, if you want to stay for the rest of the event, agree to by raising your hand.

There are some introduction games that change every time, but include tuning in to today’s desires and boundaries. We may share our mildest and wildest desires as well as our fears. There will be heart-opening exercises, and reminders of how our YES, NO and MAYBE’s feel in our bodies before we smoothly transition into free play.

There’s no focus on sexuality, you don’t have to do anything. A play party simply means that, unlike in most parts of our lives, éverything is welcome – also sexuality. We will remind you that drinking a cup of tea while being a witness is as perfect an experience as doing sexy things you never did before is. We will also remind you that sometimes these play parties are happenings beyond our wildest dreams, and sometimes they trigger the freak out of us, we feel stuck and excluded, not knowing what to do. This is amazing too, as now you have an opportunity, if you want to, to reach out for support to be with what is coming up, and maybe break your patterns and release your trauma.

A play party has no expectations or requirements. It is a space to be expressed and celebrated, to explore! You are welcome with all that you bring and who you are – at this moment.

※

About Wilrieke Sophia:

Wilrieke Sophia (she/her, they/them) is a sex & intimacy educator, conscious kink facilitator, intimacy activist, TEDx speaker, writer, and founder of Exploring Deeper and Cuddle Workshops International.

She identifies as queer, sex-positive, polyamorous and kinky. Wilrieke is based near Amsterdam, The Netherlands where they openly combine being a mother of three daughters with their work.

The main focus of her work is empowerment through self-knowledge and understanding, radical self-inclusion, the embodied experiencing of boundaries and desires, and an extensive practice of consent – all based on a foundation of trauma awareness and neuroscience, embedded in experiential spaces based on intimacy practices. Wilrieke hosts sex-positive retreats, play parties, teacher trainings, and festivals. In several projects with colleagues, Wilrieke creates workshops and materials on accountability, abuse and power dynamics in the intimacy and wellness communities. 

About Exploring Deeper:

We all need touch. Here at Exploring Deeper we believe that satisfying intimacy needs to be available for everyone. To have that intimacy, a person needs to feel safe and secure in their own body. We need to know our boundaries and desires, and we need to know how to communicate them. How does a person change their life? By doing things differently, and then repeating that new way. When it comes to intimacy, our current society does not provide us with the means, tools, and place to practice our intimacy skills.

Exploring Deeper aims to create those spaces. Laboratories for exploring intimacy – deeper. We do that by creating events, sessions, materials, and professional training. All our products and services are based on the pillars of solidarity and inclusion. This means our events are meant to be a welcoming place to you, independent of race, gender, age (though 18+), sexual orientation, relationship style, being neurodivergent or neurotypical, being disabled or non-disabled, or looks. 

We acknowledge everyone is learning and may make mistakes in addressing others, ourselves included. Making mistakes is welcomed in our workshops. Intentionally causing harm by discrimination, racism, misogyny, shaming, bullying, spreading disinformation etc is not tolerated. As a team we are actively speaking up against these issues, and repeated misconduct will lead to remove the person causing harm from the workshop and potentially withhold access to future events.

More about us:

www.exploringdeeper.com

www.cuddleworkshops.org

Instagram: @wilriekesophia

Facebook: Exploring Deeper with Wilrieke Sophia

Youtube: www.youtube.com/exploringdeeper (Debunking Lovesongs)

Check out Wilrieke’s TEDx Talk on Navigating Intimacy!

※

A few words on team ethics

Integrity and creating a safer space is super important to us, the team of Exploring Deeper. You, the participants, are not our personal dating pool. There are power dynamics that can be juicy, but also abusive.

Members of our team, regardless of their role (which may be facilitator, assistant, co-facilitator, helper or participant) will not individually date people they meet in the workshop and engage in sexual or romantic relationships. They will not have any form of fluid exchange with participants.

We might support you in your exercises or provide a service during the play party (we’re always keen on helping you improve your spanking skills for example!).

If we have pre-existing partners or lovers in the workshop, we will disclose that at the opening of the workshop when appropriate.

If you are curious about our Guidelines for Team Members, feel free to check the full document out here: https://exploringdeeper.com/ethics

※

SOME PRACTICAL INFORMATION

In the week before the event, you will receive an email with detailed information for this training. Make sure you sign up with the email address that you use. Check your spam filter if you did not receive an email seven days before the event.

This weekend takes place in a beautiful venue in Utrecht or Houten. Both venues have plenty of free parking space around the venue, and public transport easily brings you there. Check www.9292ov.nl for public transport details. Both venues are about 20 minutes by bus from Utrecht CS.

SLEEPING

The workshop doesn’t include standard lodging. There are options nearby in Utrecht (google search ‘cheap hostels around Utrecht’). AirBnB works well too (tip: ask in the event for other participants to share a room with).

Venue Utrecht: Bastion Hotel Utrecht and Van der Valk Utrecht are at walking distance.

Venue Houten: Van der Valk Houten is at walking distance.

If it is absolutely impossible to find a place to sleep for you due to long travels or finances, please do reach out.

FOOD

To keep tickets at affordable pricing, we ask you to bring some (vegetarian) lunch to share. If you bring a bit more than just for yourself, we will end up with a luscious, abundant lunch every day. Made or bought with love is equally fine!

We will provide tea, water and snacks throughout the weekend.

On the second day we have a soft ending, meaning that we will provide soup and bread, and take an hour post-workshop time to integrate and get ready to go back into the real world.

WHAT DO I WEAR?

Wear what makes you feel comfortable during the workshops. Bring some layers, as you might get hot or cold. For the play party, you can play with what you want to embody or experience: maybe a hidden part that desires some unveiling? A part you’d like to celebrate? Something that makes you feel safe to be in an exciting environment? Your pyjamas? Or do as I do and bring different options, so you can choose at the moment.

HOW MUCH IS IT?

There is a limited amount of super early bird tickets available. After that, prices increase.

There are a few budget tickets, meant for people with limited financial resources. PM Wilrieke to ask for this opportunity.

WHY GENDERED TICKETS?

We want to include everyone, whatever your gender or identification is. That means there’s space for everyone, without one group getting overrepresented. Therefore there are tickets for people who identify themselves as male, female and other. (We realize that there are many gender identities outside the binary norms. For practical reasons, we have summarized them as a category ‘other’ on the ticket sales pages. We apologize to anyone who does not feel represented by this category.)

Please only buy a ticket that represents your gender – and not any other ticket. Sold out = sold out.

Buy tickets here! >>>

※

NOTE: This event respects RIVM guidelines. These guidelines may change prior to the event. Check our COVID-19 protocols here. Ticket holders will be informed prior to the event through email.

We MAY ask for a COVID-19 quick test, vaccine, or another way to minimise the risk of spreading COVID-19 at this event. Participants will be informed through email.

Always check your SPAM folder. If you have signed out for Wilrieke’s emails, these emails won’t reach you. Reach out to Wilrieke if you did not get any information seven days before the event.

For this workshop, Exploring Deeper’s Terms and Conditions apply.

To stay updated about workshops, events and to read Wilrieke’s blog (with hundreds of articles and videos about topics like non-monogamy, s.xuality and dealing with insecurities), check www.exploringdeeper.com and sign up for our newsletter!