“Do You Still Feel Insecure and Bad about Yourself?”

“When is the last time you were insecure or thought bad about yourself?”

People ask me this question often. And it seems they expect an answer defining a moment way back in the past.

But it’s very much in the present.

Every day there are moments in which I think I’m a fraud. I know nothing. There’s nothing of value I have to bring to the world. That I’m impossible to love and not sexy at all.

And I don’t think it will ever fully go.

And it’s okay.

I think we only get better at dealing with these voices. Instead of suppressing them, we get to know them and what it is they’re trying to protect us from.

There was a time, once, when they saved us from danger.

Danger, parts of us believe is still present.

But the result is that we keep ourselves away from that what we are longing for.

Connection.

So I breathe deeply when the waves of insecurity wash over me. I’m lovable. I’m enough. I’m living my life with the utmost integrity and passion. I’m making decisions based on the wisdom, experience, and knowledge that I have now.

I may f*ck up every now and then. Not everyone may like me. Some may even strongly dislike me. It doesn’t mean I’m a bad person. It means we’re not a fit right now.

But you know what supports me most in these moments?

Realizing my desire and passion are bigger than my fear.

Gently embracing the sensitive emotions and doing it anyway.

Photo: Zoe Johansen

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