Although there are several shapes of relationships (marriage, dating, polyamory, polygamy) they still seem to be holding on to a fixed construct. Does that make sense, as we are ever-evolving and growing? And: a personal relationship update.
In any human dynamic, certain patterns will come up. And those patterns will influence how you feel and how you act. Where do you base your boundaries and desires upon? And what to do when yours are different than those of your partner?
David and I have an open relationship. For us, that means we are choosing to be primary partners, like in any ‘normal’ relationship. Besides that, we give each other full freedom to openly explore intimacy with others. I’m one of those persons who doesn’t find this just easy. Sometimes I don’t like being in an open relationship at all, but admitting that to myself feels difficult. And how can it feel that I feel like having different boundaries about a certain thing at the same time? How to deal with the insecurity? And why do some people find open relating more difficult than others (and why is it often so that one partner feels more challenged than the other)? These…
When I tell people I’m a fan of kink or BDSM, there are usually three possible responses. Many people have no idea what I’m talking about. Others wonder why someone on the path of personal growth would be interested in something abusive and violent as BDSM. And then there are some who understand and are happy to find someone who agrees. Thanks to Fifty Shades of Grey and the many erotic novels that followed in its wake, BDSM – or the SM part of it, has become more mainstream as a flavor in the bedroom. But the picture these stories sketch a very limited, and in my opinion unhealthy, picture of this erotic art form. So what is it that…
A safer spaces is a consciously designed environment to practice life. It’s a laboratory where you can practice doing things and see what the effect is. It’s not a place to do things right. Workshops might leave you with a high, bit not change your life. Embodied imprints can. Choose your workshops, play parties and other safer spaces wisely.
After #metoo and #mentoo and #metoointantra, and now Tantra workshops become more abundant than mushrooms in an autumn forest, what to do and where to go? (Little blurb of WiFi challenges halfway, skip to 3 minutes when it starts to bypass..)
Society calls me a s*x worker. And that’s okay, although what I bring is not just that. I don’t f€ck my clients. I don’t even kiss them. But I’m very intimate with them. For some of them it’s the first time in years. Sometimes the first time ever. They teach me… They teach me about the innocence of desire. The longing to connect sincerely. They also teach me how they suppress their fire, their desire to ravish. How insecure they often feel about their body and their genital area. I teach them… That it’s all okay. That their insecurity as well as their list is part of their humanness. That I love to feel their lust and desire within the…
* These writings are based on impressions from different sessions and different people. Facts about people are changed for the sake of privacy. I share these writings to create awareness of loneliness and how many of us struggle with intimacy. You are not alone. * You came to me because you had been hurt for many years. Your heart was closed and you couldn’t feel. How would you be able to relate to women again? To be vulnerable and be naked, to have sex again? As a boy you walked through the door, not knowing what to expect. We talked. I shared about my life and how I had been hurt in the past too. You relaxed, knowing you are…
When I met David some months ago (with a month being a lifetime) and we decided to step into a relationship, some of my dear friends mirrored to me that he seemed amazing, but that the relationship between us could never work. Him being a nomad wanting the experience of fatherhood, living in a community south of the equator and traveling a large chunk of the year, and even if he wouldn’t, he would still be far away. I being a mum with three kids in a weekly co-parenting schedule with a job that is a mission directly from my heart, and that requires my presence when I’m not with my kids. And I felt it too. Each time my…
