by Wilrieke | Dec 7, 2023 | Courage & Fear, Emotions & Insecurity, Relationships, Sexuality, Spirituality
Forty. It’s half my life ago when I was twenty. Double this and I am eighty. It feels like an eternity and a blink of an eye. I don’t mind getting older. I celebrate the grey hairs, although slowly the physical downfall sets in. There is so much I love...
by Wilrieke | Nov 15, 2023 | Attachment Dynamics, Courage & Fear, Dealing with Trauma, Emotions & Insecurity, Relationships
You may be well aware of the fight, flight, and freeze responses. But how well do you know fawning? Fawning is the survival strategy where you set aside your wants, needs, and boundaries to prioritize someone else’s, to maintain the connection to that person. It...
by Wilrieke | Jul 14, 2023 | Attachment Dynamics, Courage & Fear, Dealing with Trauma, Emotions & Insecurity, Nervous System and Trauma, Non Monogamy, Polyamory & Open Relating
What the fear of abandonment means to me, is an internalized conviction that people won’t like me, unless I try really hard to be nice. It shows in behavior I often barely notice myself. Pausing, to notice what the other wants, and then ‘suddenly’...
by Wilrieke | Jul 14, 2023 | Attachment Dynamics, Courage & Fear, Dealing with Trauma, Emotions & Insecurity, Nervous System and Trauma
I’m slowly getting more clarity on how emotions can escalate without reason in my head. It starts with unease in the body. I may feel down, restless. There may be a reason for that: feeling a bit lonely, waiting for a message from a loved one, practical...
by Wilrieke | Jul 14, 2023 | Attachment Dynamics, Courage & Fear, Dealing with Trauma, Emotions & Insecurity, Nervous System and Trauma, Non Monogamy, Polyamory & Open Relating
Coregulate first… When there is something between you and your partner, or someone you love, and it’s possible, coregulate first. The talk can feel urgent, words may burn to leave your mouth. But when it comes from a place of an active trigger, whatever...
by Wilrieke | May 15, 2023 | Attachment Dynamics, Courage & Fear, Dealing with Trauma, Emotions & Insecurity, Relationships
The words we choose to talk to ourselves and others with, matter. Over the last weeks, I kept saying that I didn’t want a relationship and that when I met the Wizard I went in kicking and screaming. Until he, wisely, mentioned that I linked him to something I...
