The Responsibility it takes to Relate with Someone Secure

The Responsibility it takes to Relate with Someone Secure

Have you done some research on attachment dynamics? If you haven't and desire to relate with anyone, I strongly recommend you to get familiar with this topic. I know for myself that I am pretty insecurely attached, with a preoccupancy towards anxious attachment (aka...

I’m an All-or-Nothing Type of Person. Are You too?

I’m an All-or-Nothing Type of Person. Are You too?

I'm the all-or-nothing type of person, with a strong tendency to 'all'. There's always something to do, and things can always be done better and faster. Over the years that's a good recipe for either burnout, chronic overwhelm, a fried nervous system, a complaining...

There’s a Shift in my World – and it’s not from 3D to 5D

There’s a Shift in my World – and it’s not from 3D to 5D

There's a shift happening in my world. And maybe in yours too. I'm not talking about the shift from 3D to 5D, not anything that has to do with frequencies. It's also not something new. This has happened many times before, and likely will happen many times again. It's...

Debunking Lovesongs #14: Christmas edition! Victimhood

Debunking Lovesongs #14: Christmas edition! Victimhood

We have all grown up amidst pop sings and fairytales that are all about love. But the things is, many of them are not about healthy love, but neediness, codependence and toxic relationships. Let's debunk some of them! Today: Last Christmas by Wham! Victimhood is a...

Debunking Lovesongs #13: Neediness

Debunking Lovesongs #13: Neediness

We have all grown up amidst pop sings and fairytales that are all about love. But the things is, many of them are not about healthy love, but neediness, codependence and toxic relationships. Let's debunk some of them! Today: Blinding Lights by The Weeknd Neediness:...

When Love equals Danger: Healing an Anxious Attachment Pattern

When Love equals Danger: Healing an Anxious Attachment Pattern

Some of us feel comfortable letting others close - that's called a secure attachment pattern. But many of us don't. When you have an anxious attachment pattern, it is scary to let partners come close. Basically, there are two ways of avoiding deep intimacy: through a...

Debunking Lovesongs #12: Jealousy

Debunking Lovesongs #12: Jealousy

We have all grown up amidst pop sings and fairytales that are all about love. But the things is, many of them are not about healthy love, but codependence and toxic relationships. Let's debunk some of them! Today: 'Every Breath You Take' by The Police. This song is...

Debunking Lovesongs #11: Invulnerability

Debunking Lovesongs #11: Invulnerability

We have all grown up amidst pop sings and fairy tales that are all about love. But the things is, many of them are not about healthy love, but codependency and toxic relationships. Let's debunk some of them! Today: 'The Bad Touch' by The Bloodhound Gang. Took me a...

A Story about Un-Friendzoning

A Story about Un-Friendzoning

Some connections are best as friends. Friendship can be a nourishing, complete, intimate, and healthy way of connecting. But sometimes, putting someone in the position of friend, i.e. 'friendzoning' someone, can come from a place of insecurity. Let me share with you a...

I am a Shapeshifter

I am a Shapeshifter

I am a shapeshifter. What does that mean, you may wonder? I don't become a wolf at midnight, and I can't fly. But I have many different aspects, all rolled into one. I'm shy and bold. Introvert and extravert. Feminine and masculine. Insecure and full of courage....

My Recent Spiritual Practice is Simple

My Recent Spiritual Practice is Simple

My recent spiritual practice is simple. It's simple but not easy. It takes commitment, trust, and many deep breaths. What it is? Just one sentence: "And so it is." It means deep acceptance of life as it comes. To see daily practicalities relative to the bigger...

No More #fitbody Culture

No More #fitbody Culture

I don't want to be part of the culture anymore, where we need to look a certain way. #fitbody #fitgirl #fitboy ... Hashtags with hundreds of thousands of hits. Mothers who bring their children to school in running clothes so they can optimally align having the perfect...

Debunking Lovesongs #10: Insecurity

Debunking Lovesongs #10: Insecurity

We have all grown up amidst pop sings and fairy tales that are all about love. But the things is, many of them are not about healthy love, but codependency and toxic relationships. Let's debunk some of them! Today: 'As Long as You Love Me' by The Backstreet Boys. This...

Debunking Lovesongs #9: Toxic Relationships

Debunking Lovesongs #9: Toxic Relationships

We have all grown up amidst pop sings and fairy tales that are all about love. But the things is, many of them are not about healthy love, but codependency and toxic relationships. Let's debunk some of them! Today: 'Nothing Compares to You', written by Prince and...

Debunking Lovesongs #8: Abandonment Fear

Debunking Lovesongs #8: Abandonment Fear

We have all grown up amidst pop sings and fairy tales that are all about love. But the things is, many of them are not about healthy love, but codependency and toxic relationships. Let's debunk some of them! Today: 'Breakfast at Tiffany's' by Deep Blue Something. The...

Debunking Lovesongs #7: White Knight Syndrome

Debunking Lovesongs #7: White Knight Syndrome

We have all grown up amidst pop sings and fairytales that are all about love. But the things is, many of them are not about healthy love, but codependence and toxic relationships. Let's debunk some of them! Today: 'Fix You' by Coldplay, a song Chris Martin wrote for...

Debunking Lovesongs #6: Hard to Get

Debunking Lovesongs #6: Hard to Get

Did you ever play hard to get? We have all grown up amidst pop sings and fairy tales that are all about love. But the things is, many of them are not about healthy love, but codependency and toxic relationships. Let's debunk some of them! Today: 'Fire', written by...

Poly – Mono – Poly… Wilrieke, make up your mind!

Poly – Mono – Poly… Wilrieke, make up your mind!

Some people are getting more confused about my love life than I do myself, it seems. I get that. There was a Viking, I was talking about monogamy, and now suddenly I profile myself as non-monogamous again. What is that about? Partly that is about you reading and...

Resources for White Folks who want to Educate Themselves on Racism

Resources for White Folks who want to Educate Themselves on Racism

This is an ever-evolving collection of resources for white folk who desire to educate themselves about racism, white supremacy, colonialism, cultural appropriation etc. The first lesson I received and would like to share is this: Listen. Listen to those voices who...

I have many Lovers – but I don’t want a Partner

I have many Lovers – but I don’t want a Partner

I am not with a partnerBecause I choose to. I have no desire for tumbling into patternsOf expectationsFor compromisingWhat I never wanted to compromise. The ‘happily ever after’when walking hand in handis holding on from fear. It doesn’t meanI don’t believe in...

Am I Queer Enough?

Am I Queer Enough?

It's a question I have been playing with for years. When I'm in a very binary/straight environment I feel queer, and when I'm in a non-binary/queer welcoming space, I'm worried about being perceived as an unwelcomed guest. I may generally look like your average...

When you are missing Touch and Connection

When you are missing Touch and Connection

Touch helps releasing stress. But we're in lockdown now, and many of us have a high amount of stress coming in, and little to no touch. What to do? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pSpU3uxqqyI&t=5s

(Poem #21) The Altar of Life

(Poem #21) The Altar of Life

So. Here we are. Sitting down in front of the altar of life. The sacred herbs of devotion burning, leaving traces of smoke circling around our faces. The scent intense. This is what it all come down to. Witnessing the unknown unfolding, taking in all the sensations....

Nettles and Kundalini (eat & play!)

Nettles and Kundalini (eat & play!)

I love plants. Plants can be amazing, also for intimacy! The stinging nettle is wonderful to play with - ánd healthy. You can eat it and make tea with it - but it's also looooots of fun in kinky play (solo or partnered). So social distancing or not, go get some...

Intimacy Coach & Educator | International Speaker  & Facilitator | Entrepreneur | Mother of Three

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