How to deal with other people’s emotions

How to deal with other people's emotions

Do you recognize this? You are somewhere where people aren’t feeling very happy. Maybe you’re waiting in a queue for the cash register to pay your groceries. People around you seem to be hurried. They are grumpy, annoyed when someone uses more time than strictly necessary to pay. Or you’re sitting on a train and someone is having an argument over the phone. You feel all your happy feelings leave your body. The muscles in your neck tighten. You clench your jaws. Why are these people doing this to you? Can’t they go somewhere else to express their impatience or anger? During a day there are many moments where you are exposed to the feelings, emotions and behavior of other…

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Control vs. Letting Go

Life is constantly changing and you cannot predict the future. You cannot predict other people’s behavior. And that’s pretty scary to most of us. In the midst of this chaos we are looking for something to hold onto. Stability. An anchor. And because we feel unable to find this strength within ourselves, we look for it elsewhere. We can try to control things directly linked to us. If we behave in a certain way, this will help us get through the day. We create habits that provide stability. Or at least, we think so. But in fact, these habits are controlling us. We tell ourselves we need to put on make-up before we leave the house. We need to dress…

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Be your own guru

We all need some guidance in our lives. Especially in times where many things change, it is nice to have a beacon ahead. We may find people in our surroundings or way out of reach to serve as an example. To be our personal guru. What are we looking for? In times of growth we switch from one equilibrium to a new equilibrium.  Between these stable states there is a whole landscape of chaos. We feel insecure and out of balance. We try to get hold of something stable. Someone who seems unbreakable. A superhero. What is a guru? But do superheroes exist? All the people I know face their own challenges. Even the people we value most. They also…

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Being a sexual person

Being a sexual person

A journey towards complete freedom Sometimes I meet people who I consider to be sexual persons. They don’t need to have the looks of a catalog model. It’s about their appearance, the vibe they broadcast. First of all, these people are totally comfortable in the body they are in. I’ve seen them in many shapes, from pretty young girls to chubby old men. Both tall and short, thick and thin. They all had in common that they radiated. Without exception, these people are beautiful. Just plain beautiful. They all live a life in which they follow their heart. Whether they have a job in a library, grocery store, having their own companies or are famous. They do the things they…

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Looking for confirmation

Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it. (Charles Swindoll) One day you’re at the top of the world. Everything is great. You meet great people. Maybe even some real special ones. Maybe you gave someone your number or email address. Than you go home, and all of a sudden you’re not so sure about anything anymore. You feel insecure. Next morning you switch on your computer and start to look for confirmations. Maybe there’s an email, a tweet, a message on Facebook to sooth your heavy feelings. Nothing… Maybe the other person is busy and they’ll send you a message later. You check your computer many times that day. And the next day.…

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