The difference between egoism and self-love

Putting myself first. Isn’t that a very selfish thing to do? Many of us have been taught since we were very young that we should take care of others before taking care of ourselves. We believe that it is a positive feature to be able to put others first. We’re proud of forgetting our own needs and making sure others are doing fine. The need of putting yourself first I truly believe that you can never make the people around you happy, when you are not happy yourself. How can you take care of others when you don’t take care of yourself? When a store only gives away things, it will be empty very quickly. By asking money in return,…

Continue reading

Feeling Stuck

Authors may experience writer’s block. I believe we all have times where we feel mentally stuck. I know I do. I can feel the ideas are there, but I just can’t grasp them. It’s such a frustrating feeling. Often I sit in front of my computer screen and try to force myself to get through the stuckiness , only resulting in finding many ways to procrastinate and feeling very guilty for not being as effective as I believe I should be. Accepting the stuckiness The first step to becoming un-stuck is accepting that you are stuck in the first place. By rejecting that you are stuck, you reject your feelings and emotions, resulting in struggle. And struggle leads you nowhere.…

Continue reading

Amsterdam Meet-up Details, May 4

On Saturday May 4 there will be a meet-up with Steve Pavlina (and for those who are curious about me, I’ll be there too 😉 ) at the Vondelpark in Amsterdam. From Steve’s blog: I’m currently in the Netherlands, and I’m hosting a social meet-up in Amsterdam this Saturday. Here are the details. Date: Saturday, May 4, 2013 Time: 2:00 pm (14:00) Location: In front of a statue in Vondelpark (exact location) Why a meet-up? When I travel I often receive requests from locals who want to get together and meet in person. Some people also ask me how to find others nearby who share their interest in personal growth (or some specific aspect of personal growth). Meet-ups are a…

Continue reading

The angry little witch in me

There lives a little witch in me and she’s making big fuss. She believes it is her job to protect me from harm and she is doing all she can to keep me safe. But she comes with a cost. Every time she shows her face and starts freaking out I close off. I feel afraid, unsafe and small, and choose to hide away in the safe shelter of my mind. I create walls around me that are unbreakable, unconquerable. But it is lonely in my moat. Feeling safe is a basic for all of us. We want experience love, but we can only love and feel loved when we feel safe. Long time ago, when we roamed the earth…

Continue reading

Let me show you the world in my eyes

Do you know that song from Depeche Mode? Maybe put it on while you watch at the photos in this blog post… http://youtu.be/fArx9p6oOOU I’ve been going through a time of major changes lately. Having an open relationship confronts me with my fears and insecurities daily. Do I still believe it’s worth going through all this? Yes. Would I want to go back to a monogamous relationship? Definitely not. I found out there is so much old pain and fear hidden in me. I never really loved myself. I never really looked into the mirror and loved the person I saw. Only now I’m letting go of all this shields and defenses, I can find the sparkling diamond within. And I’m…

Continue reading

Being a sexual person

Being a sexual person

A journey towards complete freedom Sometimes I meet people who I consider to be sexual persons. They don’t need to have the looks of a catalog model. It’s about their appearance, the vibe they broadcast. First of all, these people are totally comfortable in the body they are in. I’ve seen them in many shapes, from pretty young girls to chubby old men. Both tall and short, thick and thin. They all had in common that they radiated. Without exception, these people are beautiful. Just plain beautiful. They all live a life in which they follow their heart. Whether they have a job in a library, grocery store, having their own companies or are famous. They do the things they…

Continue reading

30 days of blogging

I made it! I’ve been blogging each day for the past 30 days. I did it for two reasons: To find out whether I like blogging To give my blog a kickstart and create content quickly Do I like blogging? I was curious whether I would like blogging. I’ve been trying to keep up a blog a couple of times before, but never felt really enthusiastic. Why would it be different this time? This time it’s different for several reasons: I write about my passions. It’s all about my life. It’s a little bit scary sometimes to be really open about the topics I am living. But it brings excitement. It’s releasing to be able to open up. To just…

Continue reading

Feel like crying

Some days things just don’t work out. Emotions swirl around. They don’t have a clear reason or source. They’re just there. Life seems tough. It makes me feel like crying. What’s wrong? Nothing. Everything. I don’t know! I’m so happy with the life I live. I’m so grateful for the abundance it brings me. Still tears run down my face. I want to be free of worries. Feel relaxed in everything I do. See everything and everybody as a source of blissful joy. See each day as an infinite source of possibilities. Enjoy every split second of it, smiling broadly. That’s not how I feel today. Today I feel there’s not enough. There’s not enough time for me to be…

Continue reading

Me time for moms*

*Read dad for each mom if you’re a guy. All of this applies for you too of course 😉 In your life you have many roles to play. If you are having kids, you are probably a mother (guys, read father here 😉 ), a partner, (self-)employed, a friend, a housekeeper and maybe you have other roles like player of some kind of sport, painter, hiker, etcetera. It’s not easy to distribute time equally  for each role. Often, the roles that give you pleasure and time to relax are the roles neglected. It’s just the way it goes Wake up early, stressing to get the kids ready for school, give your love a hug and a kiss (don’t try to…

Continue reading

Personal challenge update

Photo: Mariët Mons, www.marietmons.nl There are three Personal Challenges waiting for an update. Personal Challenge #0: Vegan for a month I have been vegan now for almost three weeks, and it is way easier than I thought. I stacked some healthy food stuffs like raw cocoa nibs, chia seeds, goji berries, flax seeds and whole wheat crackers. I found out that extra bitter chocolate fulfills my monthly chocolat cravings. Weekly we buy maybe 20 kilo of fruit and veggies for smoothies, salads, veggie stews and more. My parents have a large garden and started harvesting potatoes, bringing us a bag full each time they visit. I thought I would miss cheese, but I don’t. I do crave the salty, chewy…

Continue reading