I want more sex in my relationship – now what?

I want more sex in my relationship – now what?

My partner and I have been in a relationship for eight years now. In the beginning, sex was challenging. I was afraid of showing my naked body. Negative experiences from the past made me afraid to let go of control about the situation. Gradually that changed. My partner told me how beautiful he believed I was – until I started to believe it too. We started to experiment with positions and places, getting to know each other’s bodies well and knowing how to pleasure each other. Sex was still often a race towards an orgasm (preferably both at the same time) and when there were no orgasms, it felt like we failed in a way, but nevertheless we had fun.…

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I fucking love food

You heard me. I fucking love food. I did a detox where I ate 500 kcal a day for three weeks and felt much better. Until my food cravings came back worse then before. And then I read this humble article about why detox might not be beneficial for you. I love consciously indulging in life. I love food. I love my body. And somewhere there should be a balance between feeling healthy, being healthy and life’s treats (read: my current fetish for chocolate and peanutbutter). I don’t know what’s best practice. I know there’s a fine line between the masculine, focussed and determined approach (strict lifestyle modifications but also feeling tensed about everything I put into my mouth) and…

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How a detox can increase food addiction

Food addiction

I have been experimenting with nutritional supplements and doing a detox over the last weeks. One of my intentions for doing this detox, was breaking with my eating addictions. I hoped that staying away from sugar, wheat (carbs altogether) and fat for 21 days would rewire my brain into an addictive free, relaxed state. Partly it did. The cravings were still there, but they felt soft and I could handle them well most of the time. I knew I wouldn’t give into them, as I promised myself to fulfill these 21 days. But towards day 21, cravings increased. My mind found openings and options inside the challenge where I could give into the cravings. I had a conscious and very…

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How a binge during my detox made me love myself more

Detox challenge

Confession time. I had a huge binge on chocolate last night. During my detox. Over the last days I felt how little things made me feel like a loser. I was constantly subconsciously shaming myself for feeling hungry, for making my yugh-shakes into something that tasted quite alright with some stevia, cinnamon and cocoa. I was silently judging my cravings for sweets and nuts. Last night I was tired of being so tough towards myself. For 20 days I had been eating nothing but kale and other green veggies. And those proteine shakes. It was enough. So I challenged myself lovingly: ‘If you will go for sweets tonight babe, can you do that without feeling guilty? Can you enjoy it?…

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Do you let thoughts get in the way of your Life Purpose?

Life Purpose

Yesterday my thoughts tried everything to make me eat the things I don’t want to eat during my detox. There were many, many reasons to eat cheese, chocolate and nuts. I ended up eating a tomato. I woke up this morning with thoughts telling me I was failing this detox. I ate too much, I didn’t exercise enough and my body was just doing what I want it to do. Especially with the things I really want to do, the things alligned with my life purpose, my thoughts try to disctract me. Try to make me do other things. Telling me I’m too tired, not capable, I need to do other things first. I’ll do the things I really want…

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My Detox Challenge

Detox challenge

I decided to do a detoxing diet. Starting today, I’m stuffing myself with chocolate, croissants, avocado and more chocolate. Let me explain… Physical reasons for detoxing I have done a lot of work on accepting my body over the years, and come quite far. I accept my curves and my belly, which is not as tight or flat as before three pregnancies.  But I also feel that I’m not being very caring for my body. I’m indulging on chocolate almost daily and not always as dedicated to my yoga practice as I aim to be. I also believe that years of using antibiotics every now and then (last time for two months in a row to control my chronic skin…

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Are you a food addict like me?

Are you a food addict like me?

Many of us are addicted to food and we don’t know it. According to Food Addicts Anonymous “Food addiction manifests itself in the uncontrollable craving for excess food that follows the ingestion of refined carbohydrates, primarily sugar and flour substances that are quickly metabolized and turned into sugar in the bloodstream.” Now it wouldn’t be so bad if we could eat that chocolate chip cookies or Ben and Jerry’s Utter Peanut Butter Clutter Cookie Core without consequences, but: “Due to those uncontrollable cravings, a food addict’s quality of life deteriorates when he or she eats sugar, flour or wheat. It can deteriorate physically, emotionally, socially and/or spiritually.” Oh darn. Am I a food addict? I eat healthy, mostly vegan and…

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Personal challenge update

Photo: Mariët Mons, www.marietmons.nl There are three Personal Challenges waiting for an update. Personal Challenge #0: Vegan for a month I have been vegan now for almost three weeks, and it is way easier than I thought. I stacked some healthy food stuffs like raw cocoa nibs, chia seeds, goji berries, flax seeds and whole wheat crackers. I found out that extra bitter chocolate fulfills my monthly chocolat cravings. Weekly we buy maybe 20 kilo of fruit and veggies for smoothies, salads, veggie stews and more. My parents have a large garden and started harvesting potatoes, bringing us a bag full each time they visit. I thought I would miss cheese, but I don’t. I do crave the salty, chewy…

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Vegan for a month

Last week I was in Norway at the Morten Hake Summit. This congress about authentic relationships had a line up of great speakers, including Steve Pavlina, Zan Perrion, Johnny Soporno, Rob Brinded, Noah Hammond and Andy Yosha. Their speeches were inspiring and the speakers themselves stayed the whole summit, giving all participants many opportunities to shake hands, hug and have a one on one chat. The organizers and participants of the Summit appeared to be awesome people. A spontaneous hug can be the start of a warm friendship. And I hugged many people! Some returning topics during the conversations I had were open relationships and healthy food. Many new found friends appeared to be vegan or into raw food. When I…

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The very first post

This website will be a process. It won’t be a static thing, collecting words. It will be a journey through life. I will write about what’s on my mind. As I read books, join workshops and listen to podcasts and audio programs, I will share my experiences. I will combine lessons from the past with new insights. The very first thing I want to introduce in this very first post are my Personal Challenges. I will use this website and Social Media like Twitter and Google+ to challenge myself to broadcast my desires for personal growth. Why? Blogmaster Steve Pavlina explains (citations from several posts): Don’t just write down a list of goals for yourself. Share your key goals with…

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